Oh the mundanity!

Approximately 4-7 days a week I find what I believe are called “circulars” in my mailbox. It is a whopping newspapery packet full of coupons and sales announcements that drop all over the place like postcards in magazines, and I never bother to even look at it before discarding. But in the name of journalism and freedom, and because I have nothing else to do since I already watched my Netflix today (Deliverance – a movie perhaps better left unwatched), I am going to provide running commentary as I leaf through my Washington Post Shopping Guide.
The cover is a furniture ad for the “#1 livingroom value in America!” And if the $299 sofabed wasn’t enough to prove it, there is a picture of a half-smiling, half-attractive woman in the corner, which is either supposed to be a half-satisfied typical customer, or perhaps the kind of woman I can attract if I have a 6 piece living room package.
Inside the front cover the Washington Post is offering me the Sunday paper for 49 cents. I’ve ignored the zillion solicitation letters they’ve sent me, but sneaking it into the circular may just win me over. They’d like to believe that. News is for people who don’t have tremendous blogging responsibilities.
Ooh – my first glossy circular. From Shoppers, which by the looks of it is a grocery land of limitless savings. Yet even though they’ve put 10 Kraft Mac n Cheese’s on sale for $6, which is about as good as it gets in these times of economic hardship, I don’t even know where a Shoppers is.
Verizon is offering cheap wireless. Big whoop.
Safeway must also be suffering from the economic downturn, because its colored newspaper circular is Sunny Delight to Shoppers’ Fresh Squeezed gloss. Is it the Hormel Natural Choice Lunchmeat (2 for $7) or the Lawry’s Marinade (2 for $5) that gets people running to Safeway?
Next up is Giant, which is nearly identical to Safeway, and whose “fine foods for Passover” section includes Fresh Soup Mix, a Tranquil Bouquet of flowers, and California carrots. This circular needs a Jewish editor.
Don’t worry, it’s almost over.
Rite Aid has gone glossy on us, and has Free and Hot Buys! printed prominently in several places, and there’s a huge BOGO on nutritional supplements. Damned if lipo-flavonoid wouldn’t hit the spot right now.
Last up is a Manny & Olga’s Pizza page with coupons, which I guess I’ll stack up with the rest of the menu’s I get in the mail (including a Manny & Olga’s menu) and then never use. Nah. Why bother.
I can't wait to see what else I get in the mail.